Today is my one-year anniversary with DBSK, and so I am celebrating a blooming unrequited love with quite possibly the five most angelic beings who have ever graced this earth with song and dance.
Ahem. The thought of this milestone actually didn’t occur to me until a few minutes ago. I began the day like any other weekday of summer indulgence: sleeping in, lazily grabbing a bite of breakfast, and surrendering myself to the temptation that is the Internet. I revisited one of my favorite performances, “Beautiful You,” and from that moment I was irreversibly lost in DBSK fairyland for the rest of the day.
I do believe I’ve blogged more about DBSK than any other topic. My first blog entry involving DBSK drool aplenty was made on June 30th, 2009. I was introduced to DBSK by a long-distance friend, whom I met again just last week, on June 27th, 2009. I’m quite certain that my true anniversary is June 29th, however, because it was a Monday last year and I had just returned from my Thousand Islands camping trip to check out this Korean boy band sensation. It was the best decision I’ve ever made.
So I guess I’d need a heck of a lot of reasons to explain why I’ve been “in an open relationship with Dong Bang Shin Ki” on Facebook for as long as I remember. But even the title of their group speaks for itself. Rising Gods of the East. How majestic, epic, awe-inspiring is that name alone? Since late 2003, this group of five superbly talented and attractive males has brought the female population of Asia and now the entire world to its knees.
I admit that I am smitten very easily, whether with a boy half my age whopping arse on the tennis court or a middle-aged actor of a Jane Austen gentleman. But those don’t even count as fancies, and last hardly more than a day. True, I am not a dedicated enough fan of DBSK to think about them every moment, or even every day. My attention has always been stolen by school, violin, chores, other groups creeping into my heart like Super Junior, and occasionally a boy in real life (who would’ve thought my mind can wander this far?).
But I dare venture to say that in the end, I always crawl back on hands and knees to the boys (officially men, but sometimes as sweet as newborn babies) who had bewitched me a year ago and then stolen my heart with no intention of ever returning it. I finally understand that I don’t need a reason for my peculiar FB relationship status that can be seen by all. Indeed I have a myriad of reasons for falling so deeply in love with these five boys, but truly, they need not be justified. Love opposes all logic and reasoning.
At first sight I was captivated by Jaejoong. He absolutely glowed in the spotlight of the 2007 Soul Power performance of “Love in the Ice.” His vocal prowess melted me into my socks. His stunning eyes, called beautiful by women of all ages and I daresay men as well, pierce the very soul. He has no equal. Even in the realm of spicy pepper tolerance (as in eating the spiciest pepper in the world with a smile) he is unmatched.
But my first love blinded me to the other boy, whom I love just as much Jaejoong. He is Junsu, the dolphin, the cutie, the romantic, the dearest crybaby. His voice sweeps me up to high heaven. His smile is the same as a baby’s. And as for his duckbutt…no more words are necessary. The first song that brought me to tears was his “Rainy Night.” The song that made me a sobbing mess for a good half hour today is also his composition, “W.”
“W” is sung by JaeChunSu for HoMin and Cassiopeia. The lawsuit filed by Jaejoong, Yoochun, and Junsu against SM Entertainment last summer is one that I have previously blogged about with fervent indignation. The gigantic mess has cleared just slightly now, and reveals that a new group has been formed, JYJ. Jaejoong-Yoochun-Junsu. They performed in Tokyo Dome for Thanksgiving in Japan, arrived in America just a few days ago for recording, and will release their new album in August. Yunho has recently been promoting his drama “Heading to the Ground,” posing in magazines, and appearing in fan meetings. I have no clue as to Changmin’s whereabouts and activities. The first DBSK philosophy I have ever abided by, 5-1=0, is now shattered. And so, in this intense song of love and longing, JaeChunSu express their feelings in music for the first time to HoMin. And they dedicate the song also to Cassiopeia, their global fans who are named after the queen constellation shaped like a W.
It’s touching, really, the representation of DBSK and Cassiopeia etched in the heavens. We, Cassiopeia, are the stars that shine in the dark night sky that is DBSK. One cannot exist without the other. And this is the way I will always be, because I will forever support DBSK’s second philosophy, Always Keep the Faith. In “W,” JaeChunSu express not only the deep extent of their longing for HoMin, but also heartwrenchingly reveal how much Cassiopeia means to them. They tell us to keep supporting and waiting for them because they will not fail us.
This is not an empty promise. Even if DBSK is currently on hiatus and the members are split, I am certain that they can fulfill their individual dreams and reunite in the future. Time will be our guardian. And I will love them eternally because they have given me so much that is beyond the power of words to describe. Yet I have never been able to convey that gratitude and appreciation, aside from my fanlistings for Yunho and Yoochun. I will continue wishing and praying and dreaming for the five of them together. But for now, I will devote myself to JYJ and cheer on for my boys, hoping that they can still smile and be happy each day.
I really should chide myself for being so weak-hearted. One song can reduce me to a glistening puddle of tears. Although I fully indulge in bliss when listening to the magic of their voices, I also subject myself to the bittersweet heartbreak that mirrors their own inner sorrow. I cannot say whether this one-sided relationship between a mere fan and these almost inhumanly magnificent musicians is healthy or not. But without a doubt they are beyond extraordinary. My heart refuses to compare them to anyone else because DBSK is truly unparalleled in this world. They have made my year beautiful.
Here is heaven in song.
W by JaeChunSu
Kanashimi No Yukue by Junsu
For You by Jaejoong
I am so proud of my boys. My heart bleeds for them. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry in Junsu’s solo, but the tears started rolling the fourth minute. My condolences also to Jaejoong’s loss of his best friend today.